Muhyi’s gibber gabber: A brief intervention

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By Huzaifa Dokaji

I listened to a short audio clip in which Bashir Jantile sounded agitated that Muhuyi’s threat to Ganduje is worth the Governor’s attention. Unfortunately, Jantile’s fears are too utopian for Nigeria’s political reality and Muhuyi’s threat too little to scare Governor Abdullahi Umar Ganduje. Ganduje may be the most corrupt office holder in Nigeria, but Muhuyi lacks the moral rectitude to point accusing fingers at him. Muhuyi is not a victim in a noble crusade. He is an opportunist consumed by his greed. Let me itemize my views on why no one should take Muhuyi seriously, and why his exposé wouldn’t help the poor. I’ll try and keep my intervention short.

1- Muhuyi’s threat of exposing Ganduje’s corrupt practices is a no-brainer. It would have mattered in a sane polity, or one ruled by sane people. But APC’s style of rule has changed from pretending to be fighting corruption to defending and encouraging it. When the video of Governor Ganduje allegedly stuffing Dollars in his pockets surfaced, Nigeria’s president, despite admitting his limitations on technological matters, still went ahead to defend Governor Ganduje. Anyone familiar with Nigeria’s anti-corruption war knows that only those in the bad books of the powers that be are prosecuted. Muhuyi was an anti-corruption boss, and as such well aware of how the game works, although it seems he didn’t learn anything from his experience. It doesn’t make sense to assume a government that stood by Governor Ganduje in his Dollar Case, would push charges against him on the words of Muhuyi of all people. In fact, at the risk of sounding pessimistic, I beg to differ with those who think Governor Ganduje will be prosecuted after his tenure. If the allegations against him are all true, then Governor Ganduje has pilfered enough to escape any probe or buy his way out of any. Not even former Governor Rabiu Musa Kwankwaso would persecute Ganduje. Anyone conversant with Nigeria’s anti-corruption reality knows this is a bitter truth. Our country has become the safest haven for the most corrupt, evil-minded, and the deepest pit of hell for the honest and kind-hearted. Nigeria is one of few countries where integrity and kindness are a liability.

2- That Jantile and Muhuyi think there is something left to threaten Governor Ganduje with, is perplexing. Ganduje’s Dollar case is arguably the biggest corruption scandal in the history of Kano, and one of the most embarrassing in Nigeria’s history. Someone would have been ashamed of it, but not Ganduje, who still parades himself as a Governor interested in fighting corruption. Guess who aided Ganduje in selling that story? It was the same Muhuyi that is now telling the world his boss was and is corrupt. That Muhuyi thinks Ganduje could be intimidated with a corruption case is as depressing as his inanity. Like our President, Ganduje is not only spearheading a scandalous regime but heads a family torn apart by such scandals. It would be wise to accept the fact that by now, Ganduje ya tafasa, baya tsoron kuna. Muhuyi should find another means to fight his war with Baba Ganduje. But threatening to impinge on Ganduje’s integrity, if he has any, by exposing his illegal deals, is as useless as Muhuyi’s sudden honor. The Dollar video and the balkanization of the Kano emirate were the lowest Ganduje could stoop, and Muhuyi stood by his boss and helped incredibly towards that. Now, he comes to equity with soiled hands, aspiring to dine with the upright.

3- If Muhuyi thinks his actions will make the Federal Government descend on Ganduje, then he is as delusional as those who think APC is fixing Nigeria. The Federal Government is not interested in solving anybody’s problem, but those loyal to it. Ganduje’s systemic rape of Kano, its reputation and resources, does not bother the federal government. What bothers Abuja is telling the world Buhari is the best thing that has ever happened to Nigeria. The plight of ordinary Nigerians is not anyone’s business in Abuja, and they are done pretending they care. Buhari is tired of pretending to be antithetical to corrupt individuals. He is now friends with them. He defends and retains them. His spokespersons are tired of lying that he does. Femi Adesina just railroads anyone, no matter how highly placed, that thinks Buhari needs to be held accountable on anything.

4- Surprisingly, Muhuyi thinks he can eat his cake and have it. As Kano’s anti-corruption boss, what was he doing when Ganduje was committing the financial atrocities he is now threatening to reveal? Well aware of them, as his recent interview suggests, what actions did he take? If he was the noble crusader he pretends to be, why didn’t he at least persecuted those close to the Governor for the deals he is now exposing? Did he turn a blind eye as they looted Kano dry?

There are ALLEGATIONS that Muhuyi played an active role in attempts to squash, yes, not investigate, Ganduje’s Dollar Case. Whether it was sponsoring a court case to that end, or celebrities to grant solidarity interviews, is something we may know in the future. Secrets never stay hidden forever. Muhyi wants cheap popularity without the erudition and strategy to earn it. He is like a certain Ja’e my grandmother told me about. Ja’e was the type of person who, although well-to-do, didn’t bother to feed his family healthily. When she called his attention to the dangers of his attitude, he promised to change. On his way home from work, Ja’e stopped at the market close by to buy something special for his family. His choice was one yam, which he held proudly as he swaggered towards his home, as if, like my grandmother of blessed memory said, ya ci wo Dan Waire a yaki.

5- Muhuyi should forgo any thoughts of a future in politics. He has lost his battles while fighting Ganduje’s war. Thanks to political and administrative dolts like him, Ganduje has won his war and they are by no means closer to winning theirs. I have said it times without number that Muhuyi, Apakallahu, and Dan Sarauniya are the least strategic of all Ganduje’s cohorts. There is a fourth one, but it will be a dishonor to this response to include him. In their attempts to help a master build his present, they have destroyed their future. No responsible person will associate himself with them after Ganduje. Since the political clout in Kano shows the unavoidable tendency of bringing back Kwankwaso or Shekarau’s camp to power, it is safe to assume their political future is bleak. No sane person will ever trust them. They have made an enemy of almost everything and every one they should have made a friend of. They do not have a voting base. Neither professionals nor the masses respect them. They have no connection with the clerical or traditional class. They are/were just brazen opportunists deluded by hangers-on, political touts, and temporal authority. Someone needs to tell Muhuyi that one can’t be a Churchill with the brains of Idi Amin.

Huzaifa Dokaji

huzaifadokaji@gmail.com

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